Humor

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Definition 101:

Q: What's a "good administrator?"

A. The epitome of an oxymoron!

A Heavenly Story!

One day in heaven, the Lord decided He would visit the earth and take a stroll. Walking down the road, He encountered a man who was crying. The Lord asked the man, "Why are you crying, my son?" The man said that he was blind and had never seen a sunset. The Lord touched the man who could then see and was happy.

As the Lord walked further, He met another man crying and asked, "Why are you crying, my son?" The man was born a cripple and was never able to walk. The Lord touched him and he could walk and he was happy.

Farther down the road, the Lord met another man who was crying and asked, "Why are you crying, my son?" The man said, "Lord, I work for the school system." ...and the Lord sat down and cried with him.

Baby-Sitting Wages:

I'm fed up with teachers and their hefty salaries for only nine months work! What we need here is a little perspective. If I had my way, I'd pay teachers baby-sitting wages. Instead of paying these outrageous taxes, I'd give them $3.00 an hour. And, I'm only going to pay them for five hours, not for any "planning" time! That would be $15.00 a day. Each parent should pay $15.00 a day for these teachers to baby-sit their children. Even if they have more than one child, it's still cheaper than private day care. Now, how many children do they keep a day? Maybe thirty? That's $15.00 x 30=$450.00 a day.

But, remember! They only work 180 days a year! I'm not going to pay them for all those vacations they get! O.K. then, let's see...that's $450x180=$81,000.00. Just a minute. My calculator must need batteries.

Hmmm, some teachers might ask, " What about those teachers who have Master's Degrees (or higher) and, say, ten years of experience?" Well, maybe (just to be fair) they should get $6.00 an hour. O.K., that's $6 x 5 hours x30 children= $900 a day x 180 days= $162,000.00. Wait a minute...!